There’s not much of my childhood I remember. I remember hating nursery school and been bullied by the nursery school teacher’s kid.

I remember nearly drowning on holiday one year. I remember leaving the house one afternoon without telling my gran and her tripping me up with her walking stick when I got home and whacking me with it.

I remember been bullied in primary school and been teased in high school. I remember getting the hiding of my life after coming home snot faced drunk after supposedly studying maths with a friend. And I remember the look of horror on my my mom’s face when she walked in on me and boyfriend fumbling around at 2nd base.

But I also remember my mom picking me up from school every single day. I remember her driving me to all my extra mural activities and sitting patiently while I danced, swam, net balled and tennised through primary school.

I also remember my mom not missing a parent’s evening or an eisteddfod and I remember her cheering me on as I played the drum in our annual Christmas play at school. There were the long nights I was sick where she sat with me, patting my forehead with a damp face cloth and letting me lie in her lap.

I also remember that she was the first one I went to when I needed a shoulder to cry on and someone to tell me that it’ll all be okay. I remember saying nasty and hateful things to my mom because I knew she would be the only person who would still love me, unconditionally, completely. ;

I never appreciated the selflessness and dedicated love of my mom until I became one, and in tough parenting moments and after ‘Don’t-push-me-cos-I’m-close-to-the-edge’ days I want her to know that even though I never said it enough I was, and am still, grateful for all that she is, all that she taught me and all that I am because of her. ;

In a blink of an eye Emma is almost four. And if I close my eyes a little longer she’ll be in her teens. There are things I want my little girl to remember and keep close to her heart, no matter where her path leads her and where mine ends. I tell her these things every day, and I’ll carry on doing so until they become her thoughts ;

You are my prayer answered

You are brave, smart, funny and beautiful

Surround yourself with people who make you feel braver, smarter, funnier and more beautiful

Don’t live with regret. Rather go-get

There will never be anyone good enough for you in my eyes

You have made me a better person. The kind of person I always wanted to be

I might not have loved you right but I could never have loved you more

You are my happy place

When daddy throws you above his shoulders it’s you can see just how high you can fly ;

Treat people with kindness and respect

Every one is worth your time

Never take ‘no’ for answer but never be afraid to say ‘no’

Life can be hard but not living it is even harder

Never forget your first dance was with your dad

When looking for love, look for the way you are loved by us

Some things are meant to be questioned

You can do anything a boy can. In fact you can do it better

But most of all I never ever want you to forget the love we share, the fun and the laughs. It’s these things that make a house a home. And ours is the homiest home I know xxx

Sent from my iPhone


One thought on “what I want Emma to remember

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