Murphy’s Law Baby’s Law The Commandments According to Kids The Importance of Being Flexible For F***’s Sake!
Murphy’s Law, Smurphy’s Law! When it comes to kids there are those FFS moments!
Here’s a few of mine! What are yours?
1. They will cry as soon as you get in the bath or shower!
2. They will vomit on your Sunday best outfit
3. Nappy deep in toys, they will roar thunderously for THAT toy that another child has
4. The day you don’t cook veggies guess what they’ll want to eat? Yes, veggies!
5. They’ll sleep through sirens, gun blasts and ‘im’ageddinoutta here’ but whisper to your partner ‘are you in yet?’ and as true as nuts (pun intended) they’ll wake up
6. They will swallow the contents of the item that reads DO NOT SWALLOW
7. They will need an outfit change as you’re rushing out the door already late for your appointment
8. They will be sick on the one day that you can’t not be at work
9. They will scream and jump up and down and rant and rave for something AND they will lose
interest in it two minutes later
10.They will fall asleep as you arrive at your destination
11. They will put their fingers in places they shouldn’t – plug holes, butt holes, nose holes
12. They will eat play doh and poop out figurines…yet they won’t eat what’s on their plate
13. They will, as you’ve packed their luggage, need THAT toy right at the very bottom
14. They will choose the broken toy to play..and then throw a wobbly because it doesn’t work
15. They will repeat what you said about THAT family member to THAT family member
16. They will be constipated for days UNTIL you forget their nappy at home
17. They will eat anything found on the floor that looks like a raisin but they won’t eat an actual raisin
18. They will insist on being carried when you need them to walk. They will want to walk when you need to carry them. They will refuse to sit in their stroller…until there isn’t a stroller around. Then they’ll want the stroller
19. They will wake up sparrow fart early on weekends but battle to get up for school in the week
20. They will scream and shout to leave somewhere…until it’s time to leave somewhere