Dorah the Explorer and her side-kick monkey, Boots, are always up to some exciting adventure and at the end of the show, when they’ve done what they set out to do they screech WE DID IT. Well, my friends, last night my husband and I did it! After months of not doing it. I eventually took the bull by the horns, or rather the man by the b*lls and we did it.
Emma had had a fun day, I had put her to bed, put the TV off and still seemed to have little bit of energy left, so I thought ‘what the heck, I’ll get hubs off too…’ Needless to say it didn’t last very long but as a man he got what he needed and I’ve bought myself some time.
Which brings me to this conclusion. As much as we think men are from Mars, they’re actually from Penis. Men think and do with their light sabres, while women are a bit more complicated. Okay, I concede, a lot more complicated. For us intimacy is not all about the act itself. It’s the build up to the act. It’s preparing us for the moment. It’s not waiting for us to get into bed at 11:40pm (before we turn into a pumpkin and you want to eat) and asking whether we’d like to bump and grind or my personal best, “can I make you squeal like a pig?”
As much as Hollywood tells us that love is always passionate and physical and full of happy moments, the reality is a relationship is hard. Marriage is harder. And a marriage nearing nine years, well, that’s almost impossible. When people ask me how long I’ve been married, I tell them eight years…and then add that if I had murdered someone I would be out of jail already…they laugh nervously and walk away to the next sociopath. 
We’ve had our ups and downs (some of them are stories on their own) and we’ve survived. We’ve gotten through tough financial times and the introduction of a new baby. We’ve survived four dogs taking over our space and our love nest. Misunderstandings and disagreements seem to have made us stronger and we’ve reached a level of patience, understanding and trust. And we love one another. Truly, madly, deeply (to quote a cliched pop band)
I love Mark because he gets me. Really really gets me. Mark can look at me and see somethings wrong

Almost nine years on, Mark makes me laugh. Like pee myself, ROTFL kinda laugh

Mark is incredibly sexy when he dances. Just the slightest dance move and my knees go wobbly – yes, even now

Mark’s heart is a big, mushy lump of clay. He loves deeply. Feels freely and expresses himself openly

Mark loves children and animals. Adults he’s a little more cautious around. But the love and tenderness he has for the meek and the mild, the woolly and the wild, makes me fall in love with him a little more each day
Mark is humble. And humility is sexy

Everyday, for the last 8 and a half years I get an sms from Mark, telling me how much he loves me. Yup. Every single day

Mark is the ying to my yang. He’s the froth on my cappuccino and the icing on my cupcake. He’s the knife to my fork, the butter to my bread, the o to my vary. Without him I’m not quite complete

Mark knows when I need some time alone. And he happily gives it to me

Mark treats his mom well and is always respectful to her. He is kind and caring and concerned and that’s the kind of man I want in my corner
He is my voice of reason, when I need it most
He thinks the sun shines out of my bum (most times)

Mark isn’t a push-over when it comes to me. However with Emma and his mutts he is, totally

Mark will arrive home with flowers or a sweetie pie or a Chelsea Bun for me, just because

Mark can nag like no one I’ve ever known. About my eating, my smoking, my lack of sleep…and as much as I roll my eyes at him, I love that he cares

Often, when I’m angry or tired or angry and tired with home, with Mark, with everything else, I take some time out to remember how I felt when we first met. How every minute spent with him was exciting and fun. How I would get so jealous if I saw him talking to another girl. 
And then I put a little list together of all the things I actually love about him and put aside my frustrations and anger and realize he is the person I fell in love with years back, and the person I still love today… At our wedding I said a speech (of course you did, I hear you say) and I ended it with a quote from Winnie the Pooh (who wouldn’t, I hear you ask):

“If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you.” – winnie the pooh

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s